Monday

Natalie gave me great blood gases for Mother's Day-it was all I asked for. They were able to change the mode on the vent to one that allows her to do more work. The vent settings are tweaked whenever her blood gases are good enough to allow changes.

Tonight when I arrived the nurse said she had noticed a soft bump under Natalie's arm. It caused a lot of discussion with the doctors who were concerned about infection. They drew a blood culture and CBC to look for signs of infection. Her white count is elevated but I don't know how significant it is. We are still waiting to see if they will start her on antibiotics or wait it out. By the time I was at the hospital the mystery bump was gone but the hand on that side was a little cool to the touch.

I gave Steve the update when I got home and Annie said "I miss Natalie, too." It is so hard to explain all of this to her. Yesterday I remembered that the TLC show about the Duggars had filmed episodes in a NICU (their youngest daughter was very premature) and let Annie watch some scenes with the baby in the incubator. It was a great way to let her see what we are talking about. When she saw the tiny baby she pointed and said "I want one of those!" I laughed and said "You HAVE one of those, we just have to wait to bring her home."

Annie continues to have big plans for her baby sister. Last night she told me "I'm going to teach her how to swim, and how to climb, and how to do sit-ups and push-ups and how to lift weights up and how to balance like a ballerina." When I saw Natters tonight I told her she better rest up because sister has big plans ahead.

I am very much hoping that she shows no further signs of infection and that her blood gases continue to be good enough to allow further decreases in vent settings. I am so anxious for her to get off the vent and on to C-PAP. I have to remind myself that is all on her time schedule. Every night I tell myself this is one more day on the vent that is over with. I don't know how many more days of ventilation there are ahead, but each one we put behind us is a success.